Ripped postcard

I follow all the right tunnels,
none ever have what I am looking for at the end.
He whispers to me ,
yet the redundancy makes my mind drift.
Oh look how shiny!
The sparkle fades and I mourn.
With a life this crazy you'd think I'd have stories,
but I don't.
You track my moves like an animal,
waiting for my failures.
I googled myself yesterday.
Odd. abrasive. Intrusive.
But that's what you wanted!
Did I?
Will you remember me tomorrow
if I were to cure a disease?
No, but you'd remember only failures
and when I fell on my face.
But this is okay with me.
Acceptance is half the battle.
Why try to change,
when the end is always so clear?
Mark this words,
I chose this.
Kick it around for awhile
until it means something to you.
Because obviously I don't,
nor do you to me.