Newness

I hated you,
so I changed myself.
I hated what I saw around me,
so I looked harder at myself.
What I saw amazed me.
I saw repetition.
I saw selfishness.
I saw doubt.
I saw exhaustion.
So I ran the opposite way.
I changed everything.
Nothing repeated.
I gave till there was nothing.
Shoulders back I ran without direction.
Still tired, I am fulfilled.
Judge me if you need to,
if you can sleep that way.
Don't ask me to lie for you anymore.
My patterns are permanently broken.

Eyes Open

Pushing forward
No I'm not going away
Waited for too long
Come too far
Tried too hard
Your opinion is obsolete
So laugh and point
I don't care
You don't hold me back
I do
Not anymore
I have been scared
to grow up
to make up
to give in
to surrender
to try
to waste away
But I've stayed frozen
which is just as bad
I won't
freeze here
take your crap
feel less than you
feel hopeless
Because I see
what you tried to block
I'm pushin past
I see it now
I believe it
I will be it
You just watch

scissors

You cut me out,
but now I've got my glue.
Time to reappear
and make the picture complete.
Too many holes in the story
and there's too many pages left unturned.
I am grabbing the pencil now.
My light sketch will be retraced.
My lines will be bold and bright.
You will see me.
You'll have no choice.